Last week I got an invitation to go to my last place of employment’s Holiday Party today and after a lot of reflection and thinking about it, I decided not to go last night. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to see most of the people that were going to be there, because I really, really wanted to see them, especially since I stay in contact with many of them through Facebook.
I loved working there and the people were for the most part really great. While I would have enjoyed talking and gabbing with them, I would have felt out of place. I am no longer a part of the “team”, as much as I was a part of the “team” over 18 months, I am now an outsider.
So I didn’t go and feel comfortable with my choice. Although it would have been nice to see some of the people that I really enjoyed being around.
Like they say, you can’t live in the past and you are not who you were, you are who you are now.
Memories are great and sometimes it is better for them to remain good memories.
So instead of going to the party, I went and ran 5.0 miles on the treadmill and saw another alumni of where we worked who retired from there this summer. He evidently decided to not go as well, which sort of validated my choice just a bit. I was on the treadmill and he was headed out the door, so we didn’t get to talk, it would have been nice to have talked about it with him, but it was not to be.
Now my run was a steady state run where I got on the treadmill, ran the same speed (7.1 mph) until I finished. No big deal and I felt strong the entire run and could have easily run much faster.
Although the Garmin 35 was WAY off with the distance (6.1 miles), compared to what I actually did according to the treadmill 5.0 miles. Which in this case was definitely more accurate. I need to calibrate the runs and now I remember how to calibrate them, so at least I get the correct (according to the treadmill at least) mileage.
One of the reasons that I wanted a new watch with a heart rate monitor was to give me an independent measure that would tell me how hard my body was working that was based on more than how I felt.
The heart rate scale gives me that and while my average heart rate at 146 bpm was in the “red line” or “very intense” range according to many of the sources I have been reading, it didn’t feel all that difficult.
Actually I was in the 150s (all out intensity range), which doesn’t feel all out at all to me for most of the last part of the run. I haven’t got a clue what the spike up to 169 bpm was all about, but I have a feeling that might be one of the reasons that the Doc wanted me to get the heart rate monitor.
So I am either delusional or in better shape then I thought. I kind of hope that it is the latter. Hehehehe
As a part of all this I have updated my spreadsheet running log to include a lot of new fields that I want to keep track of.
It gives me a bit more data to crunch about my running and forces me to look at the data and take a look at the trends that will show up that I haven’t been tracking in the past.
The reality is that
I did miss not going to the Holiday party and seeing a lot of the people I still consider to be my friends, but it didn’t feel right for me at this point to go. So I didn’t.
Moving to more of the heart rate training versus training by feel is going to be an interesting and very long adjustment. More for the psychological side than the physical – it is an ego thing and something I have to figure out if it is for me or not.
However, I have a feeling that the changes I have made to my running log will help me identify things that I would not have noticed otherwise.
A good day and one where I get to learn more about running and how my body reacts to it.